This post is devoted to those things that most interest the unique people of Shreveport. Here’s some stuff that Shreveport people like:
The idea of a dog park.
Parks built specifically for dogs have become so incredibly trendy in other cities, and the “Shreveport is Jealous” levels have reached a pinnacle. Here’s a newsflash, dog-parkers: Every park is a dog park to a dog. Cat people, lemme hear ya…
Buying frozen alcohol without getting out of your car is a Shreveport tradition. It’s truly amazing that just a little, bitty piece of tape stands between you and an open container violation.
Defending Duck Dynasty.
You can bad-mouth our governor. You can diss us about our state’s poor education or how bad our streets and roads are. You can even call us out on how we blindly support some of most corrupt politicians in the nation. But so-help-us-God if you say anything discouraging about the Robertsons…
Going to Dallas.
Close to the edge of the desert in Texas, the people of Shreveport have a blonde, football-loving mistress who’s funner and sexier than Shreveport. She is the fantasy of many, some so much that they’ve even contemplated leaving Shreveport for her. Dallas, you are a Shreveport home-wrecker. And that brings us to the next thing Shreveport people like…
Talking about how much better Dallas is than Shreveport.
Hey, we’re realists here; it’s impossible for Shreveport to compete with Dallas win it comes to sporting events, concert venues, and shopping. But some Shreveport people have a big-time “grass is greener” complex. Look, next time you’re sitting in bumper-to-bumper traffic on a toll road on your way to some Dallas mall, remember this: you could’ve bought it online, and the worst traffic jams in Shreveport occur only on Sundays in church parking lots.
Doing a “check-in” at church.
If you go to church but don’t check in on Facebook/Foursquare and don’t tweet about the pastor’s message, how does God and everyone else know were you actually there?? YOU MUST DOCUMENT IT. Just a reminder to all the believers out there: none of these check-ins will record your name in the Lamb’s Facebook of Life.
You’re at the gas station innocently buying a Snapple (you still drink Snapple?), and there it is – calling you with it’s sweet siren song of juicy gossip and awesome mugshots of your neighbors. Admit it, Shreveport: It’s your guilty pleasure.
Talking about the Dallas Cowboys.
While it can be argued what the favorite NFL team of Shreveport people is, there’s no debate as to the most talked about team. Hate ’em or love ’em, people around here talk about the Dallas Cowboys more than any other NFL team.
Pretending we’re Cajuns.
No matter how many king cakes or “Laissez Les Bon Temps Rouler” shirts or fleur-de-lis we buy, we’ll never be authentically Cajun. Until we come to that realization, though, we gon’ have a good time, shah.
What unique, Shreveport people quirks did we leave out? Tell us in the comments section…