Last week, we posted a fun little list of certain Shreveport “facts” that received an unbelievable amount of views (Thanks, Mom!) and much criticism.  The complaints were that the list of common facts that only seasoned Shreveport residents know was lacking many, many other things. This shocked us because, while we’re used to seeing public outcry about posts we’ve written, this was the first time there was public outcry that we hadn’t written more. 

We’ve decided to BEAT A DEAD HORSE respond to all of your suggestions of other Shreveport “facts” we left out with the absolute best things our viewers informed us that we completely overlooked.  It was tough to pick only 5 more of your suggestions, but, without further yapping, here is the next (and FINAL) list of “facts” only people from Shreveport know.

 

1.  Icy/snowy roads are way too dangerous to drive to work on. Better head to Thrill Hill.

Downhill scene from National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation

It’s no secret that one measly inch of snow/ice can bring Shreveport’s transit system to its knees, and it can also make for a fun morning of careening down a closed, steep city street on a trash can lid.

In the winter, there’s no better place to go sledding in Shreveport than Thrill Hill.  A slight dusting of snow, a little layer of ice, and that place turns into Steamboat Springs. Nobody’s done it yet, but don’t be surprised if one day some South Highlands entrepreneur installs a lift line for the throngs of sledders.  I’d drop at least a Hamilton on a Thrill Hill season lift pass.

 2.  Even though it was probably a safety hazard, that rocket slide at Betty Virginia Park should’ve never been torn down.

Not the actual BVP slide, but close to it.

There is no pictorial evidence on the web of it ever being at Betty Virginia Park, but its image will vividly remain in the memories of all those who experienced it.  5-year old Me remembers it being around 800 feet tall.  Sliders would reach speeds of over 100 mph, I seem to recall.  The whole thing was constructed of the most unforgiving steel known to man with the slide itself a shiny slip of chrome to make sure it stayed really warm in the August sun. Looking back, it seems puzzling as to how, but this thing really did make for a fun childhood.

 

3. TOP SECRET: The best dish served at Superior Grill isn’t even on the menu. 

Only a select few know the secret decadence of the Superior chicken nuggets.  No, that’s not a typo.  CHICKEN.  …  …  NUGGETS.

Before you get all snooty and scoff at the idea of a grown-up ordering such a sophomoric meal, understand this:  These aren’t your regular, run-of-the-McD’s chicken nuggets.  These are special, royalty even.  These are gated-community chicken nuggets. These chicken nuggets pay extra for their kids to go to a different, more exclusive school than the one attended by the regular chicken nuggets’ kids.  Am I hitting home yet, snobs?

Order them around less-informed Shreveporters or out-of-towners, and you’ll definitely raise some eyebrows. Just slyly look back at them and say, “You’ll soon see why I just did that.”  And none will be the wiser.

Superior Nuggets have never been photographed. They’re THAT exclusive.

 

4.  All pizza should be sliced using the Johnny’s Pizza Method. 

Perfection

Johnny’s pizza is perfection: the sauce, the dough, the toppings, the manageable size of the pieces.  But Johnny’s pizza is also a brilliant geometrical wonder.   They’ve created food in the shape of a circle that somehow still has four corners.  Your move, Stephen Hawking.

 

5.  We’ve done fine without the Shreveport Captains and Minor League baseball being around, but would someone PLEASE open a business that serves ice cream in helmets?

Whoever thought of this = genius.

When I think of great American ideas, I think of freedom, baseball, and ice cream in a helmet. And it just so happened you could enjoy all three at Shreveport Captains games in the 80s and 90s.

While baseball might not be coming back to the area any time soon, there’s no reason why a Cubs mini-helmet full of soft-serve (swirl, please) can’t.  Am I right?

As stated in the first installment, are these all of the “facts” only Shreveporters know? Heck no!  We’re just working with limited time and brain power.  Feel free to comment on what we left out, and maybe they’ll make it into one of our other posts about Shreveport.